Story 58: Reza Shadey and the Great Weather Catastrophe
One sparkly spring morning, Reza Shadey, the fluffiest and most important cat in the universe (just ask him), made a magnificent discovery. Tucked away in Mrs Higgins' conservatory, he found a shiny brass object with a golden dial and a little black needle. "Aha! A Royal Weather Machine!" he declared, puffing out his chest. "Clearly, this is a job for a superior intellect. My intellect."
He gave the glass a very important tap with his paw. TINK! The needle wiggled and pointed to 'Very Dry'. "BEHOLD!" he announced to Penelope, who was washing her paws nearby. "My machine predicts a glorious heatwave! I shall permit a Great Sunshine Picnic to celebrate my cleverness!"
Penelope tilted her head, looking at the grey clouds gathering outside. "Are you sure, Rezzi? It looks a bit... gloomy."
"PISH-POSH!" scoffed Reza. "Your eyes deceive you. The machine does not lie! This is precision science! Now, assemble the troops!"
He raced into the garden, tail held high like a furry flagpole. "ATTENTION, MINIONS! YOUR KING DECREES SUNSHINE!" he yowled. Ginger Tom blinked sleepily from under a rose bush. "Does that mean extra snacks?"
"A banquet!" promised Reza. "Bring cucumber sandwiches, a trifle and your finest sun hats! Tiger, you are in charge of enthusiastic sun-dancing!"
Tiger bounced like a furry pogo stick. "Can I wear sunglasses and do the floss dance?"
"Naturally!" said Reza grandly, already picturing himself on a throne of cushions, being fanned with a large leaf.
By lunchtime, the garden was ready. A tartan blanket was spread on the lawn, piled high with treats. Reza lounged on a velvet cushion under a stripy parasol, wearing Mrs Higgins' gardening hat as a crown. "Let the sunshine celebration COMMENCE!" he purred.
But just as Tom reached for a sausage roll, a small, grey cloud floated overhead. "Do not panic!" declared Reza. "It is merely a decorative puff, sent to admire my magnificent picnic."
Then came a raindrop. PLOP! It landed right on Reza's nose. Then another. PLIP! On Penelope's ear. Then ten more. PLIP-PLOP-PLIPPITY-SPLAT!
Reza's ears twitched. "This is not in the forecast!" he squeaked, his tail fluffing up to twice its normal size. "That traitorous weather machine!"
Suddenly, the sky turned dark grey and the heavens opened. Rain poured down! The sandwiches turned into sad, soggy lumps. The trifle dissolved into a pink puddle. "MY PICNIC! MY VELVET CUSHION! MY REGAL FLUFF!" wailed Reza.
It was cat chaos! Penelope dashed elegantly under the garden bench. Tom grabbed three sausage rolls and dived into the shed. Tiger bounced about, trying to catch raindrops in his mouth. "Whee! Free juice!"
Reza, frozen with royal outrage, was drenched by a giant SPLOOSH! from the overflowing water butt. He yowled like a wet trumpet and bolted under the nearest wheelbarrow. He sat there, shivering and dripping. "Water is for ducks and bath time! Both are equally dreadful!"
Penelope peered under the wheelbarrow. "Perhaps next time we should just look at the sky, Rezzi? Or maybe ask a passing worm?"
Reza blinked water from his eyes. "Hmph. Don't be ridiculous. This was merely a... surprise weather drill. To test your reactions. You all passed. Barely."
When the rain finally stopped, Reza strutted back into the garden. He looked like a damp dust mop but acted like a king. "BEHOLD!" he announced to a soggy bee. "The sun returns! Just as I predicted! My forecast was PERFECTLY timed!"
He curled up on his squelchy cushion, gave one magnificent, regal sneeze (AH-CHOOOO!), and declared to no one in particular: "The picnic was a ROARING success! We experienced all types of weather. Very... educational." As he drifted off to sleep, he mumbled: "Tomorrow... I shall be Chief Mud Inspector. The salary will be double."
Night night. Sleep tight.