Story 82: Reza Shadey and the 'Purrington Palace Prettiest Pet' Predicament
Snuggle down tight, little ones. Let me tell you a tale about a very particular Persian cat named Reza Shadey, whose idea of fairness was as fluffy and one-sided as his own magnificent tail.
The social event of the season was the 'Purrington Palace Prettiest Pet' competition. The air buzzed with excitement and the scent of expensive pet shampoo. The village hall was full of hopeful pets: chinchillas in tiny hats, dachshunds with sparkly teeth, and even a goldfish in a very clean bowl.
At the main judge's table sat the kind Mrs Higgins. Beside her sat her "Special Advisor", Reza Shadey himself.
"An opportunity",Reza had thought. "A chance to make my friends win. Then they'll be so grateful, they'll owe me biscuits forever."
His motive was not friendship. It was a cunning plan for future snacks.
The second judge appeared on a large screen. It was the famous cat guru, Mo Squibbins, who was still away on his book-signing tour. He looked very wise, even on a screen.
But Reza had a secret plan.
He had asked Sinan the clever raccoon to help him. Sinan had provided a hidden remote control. With one press of a button, Reza could change Mo Squibbins's scores to anything he wanted.
As Reza settled onto his cushion, he began to purr. Mrs Higgins smiled and stroked his fur.
"Seems you are looking forward to this", she murmured.
Little did she know, the day would be guided not by her gentle heart, but by Reza's paw on a hidden button.
The competition began.
First up was a basset hound with floppy ears. Mrs Higgins gave him a good score of 7.
Mo Squibbins entered his score.
Click!
Reza's paw twitched.
On the giant scoreboard, Mo's score dropped to 2.
"Ah", Reza purred smugly. "Mr Squibbins thinks his ears are 'not floppy enough'."
Mrs Higgins looked puzzled, but simply nodded.
Next came a brave, wobbly, three-legged dachshund. Mrs Higgins, touched by his spirit, awarded a 9.
Mo Squibbins entered his score.
Click!
Reza's tail flicked.
The score flashed, then changed to 0.
"Indeed", Reza announced. "The wise Guru says this dog is 'too wobbly'."
The crowd began to murmur. That did not seem fair at all.
A hedgehog, its quills gleaming, rolled into a perfect ball. Mrs Higgins gave it a 7.
Mo Squibbins entered his score.
Click!
The score dropped to 2.
"The Guru says he is 'too prickly'", Reza mused, pretending to think deeply.
A goldfish swam gracefully in its sparkling bowl. Mrs Higgins gave it a 7.
Mo Squibbins typed his score.
Click!
The scoreboard showed 0.
"As Mo Squibbins wisely says, 'To find the fish, one must first become the water'. This fish is 'too fishy'. Disqualified."
Watching from the side, Penelope's elegant whiskers twitched. She had seen Reza's sneaky paw movements. A flicker of suspicion crossed her face.
the terrier bounded onto the stage, wagging furiously. Mrs Higgins smiled and gave him an 8.
Mo Squibbins entered his score.
Click!
The score dropped to 1.
"The Guru finds the tail-wagging 'too happy'", Reza declared.
The murmurs grew louder. This was getting ridiculous.
Finally, it was time for Reza's friends.
Penelope floated onto the stage, graceful and poised. Mrs Higgins marked a score of 9.
Mo Squibbins entered his score.
Click!
Reza beamed.
The scoreboard flashed 10 out of 10.
"A vision of feline elegance", cried Mrs Higgins. "And Mr Squibbins clearly agrees."
Ginger Tom, who had been napping backstage, performed a charmingly sleepy roll. Mrs Higgins gave him an 8.
Mo Squibbins entered his score.
Click!
Another perfect 10 appeared.
"Subtle artistry", declared Mrs Higgins. "And Mr Squibbins sees it too."
Tiger, full of bounce, pounced on an imaginary butterfly. Mrs Higgins gave him an 8.
Mo Squibbins entered his score.
Click!
Yet another perfect 10 appeared.
"Unrivalled agility", cried Mrs Higgins. "Another perfect score from Mr Squibbins."
The results were announced.
To no one's surprise, Penelope was declared the Purrington Palace Prettiest Pet, with Ginger Tom and Tiger as runners-up.
The crowd booed loudly.
Shouts of "Fraud!" and "Fix!" filled the air.
Penelope walked slowly to the winner's podium, her head held low. She looked at the gleaming trophy, then at Reza, who was preening with smug satisfaction.
Then Penelope did something extraordinary.
"I... I cannot accept this prize", she meowed, her voice soft but firm.
A gasp swept through the hall.
Reza's triumphant purr stopped with a sad little gurgle.
"What?! This was not part of the biscuit agreement!"
"This prize", Penelope said, stepping forward, "belongs to a true champion."
She looked at the three-legged dachshund.
"To the brave dog who showed courage and spirit."
Then she gently nudged the gleaming trophy across the stage with her nose.
"He is the true winner", she declared.
A roar erupted from the crowd — but this time it was cheers.
The dachshund's owner rushed forward with tears in her eyes, while the little dog wagged his tail furiously.
The other pet owners clapped and cheered.
Mrs Higgins, finally realising what had happened, looked from the cheering crowd to her very guilty-looking cat.
"Oh, my dear Reza", she whispered. "You really are a cheeky monkey."
Mo Squibbins, on the screen, gave a cryptic nod, and the connection flickered off.
Reza Shadey's grand plan was in tatters.
With a dramatic sigh, he slipped off his velvet cushion. He stalked off the stage, tail held high in a pathetic attempt at dignity, muttering about the "uninformed masses" and the "sheer injustice of true genius being unappreciated".
He was still magnificent, of course.
Just not, perhaps, the most magnificent judge.
Night night. Sleep tight.